Sunday, April 19, 2009

Totally Wasted Movie Reviews #2: The Spirit

Okay... I'm totally wasted (11 shots of tequila... I kept a running tally)

This totally awesome review is for the "film" The Spirit... see 2 posts ago for a synopsis 'cause, seriously, I can't recap...

Anyway... this review is the bomb... here we go:

The Spirit... FAIL!!!

I'm seriously only about 15 minutes in and I can't watch another second. What a waste of tequila!!!

Rather than waste any more of my wastedness on a review, I'll say this: don't waste your time... not even one second. And, if you watched the trailer I posted, I apologize for wasting those moments of your life.

Instead, here are the notes I was taking as I was wasting 15 minutes of my life!

[spoilers ahead]


Trailers: Blue Ray T2 = Awesome!

Hulk vs... - Awesome!

Crank / Transporter - LAME!

Opening visually captivating

Sin City?? LAME...

Action solid... so far

Thumbs up

Eva Mendes :)

Bathroom Break - I'm F-Bombed up (11 shots)

Frank Miller cameo lame

Underwater scene - wizzeak!

Sound design nice... as far as sounds... but wrong in a cinematic sense. Incongruous.

Samuel L. Jackson first words, "Heads up" (then he hits The Spirit with a head) HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!


Scarlett Johansson!!! (Call me!)

Eyelashes??? 72 pt. "WTF???"

If it wasn't for you, dear reader, I would have shut this off now.


Sorry... I can't watch this...


p.s. Watching 'Lost in Translation' instead... at least until I pass out. Say... does anyone know how to get vomit stains out of a white, ultra-suede couch?

p.p.s. Have I mentioned how much I love Scarlett Johansson's character in Lost in Translation? 'Cause I kinda do... (Call Me!)

1 comment:

  1. Haha, I'll add you to the list of people I know who have watched the first part of this movie. I don't know anyone who's made it all the way through. Everyone's warned me off so I haven't seen 1 second of it.

    Also, watch Hulk vs! I saw Hulk vs Wolverine from that series recently and it's THE best depiction of the Hulk I've seen.